How to Ask for an Example When an Explanation Is Too Abstract

Use the Example Type Selector

These four categories are a FunFluen practical teaching tool, not an official taxonomy.

The Council of Europe’s CEFR clarification descriptors explicitly include asking for explanation or clarification to understand complex, abstract ideas and asking follow-up questions about ambiguous or poorly articulated points. Targeted clarification is a communication skill, not evidence that you failed to listen.

Before asking, diagnose the fog

“I don’t understand” can hide several different problems. If you ask for the wrong repair, you can receive another perfectly grammatical explanation that leaves you exactly where you started.

Problem: the idea is too complex

Imagine a teacher says:

“Opportunity cost is the value of the next-best alternative forgone when a choice is made.”

You may understand individual words but still be juggling too much abstraction. Do not ask for three more definitions. Shrink the case:

“Could you give me the simplest everyday example first?”

Problem: there is no real situation

Your manager says:

“Make the weekly update more strategic.”

The missing information is not necessarily another definition of strategic. You need to see the instruction operating on a real piece of work:

“Could you give me a concrete example of what you’d change in one of our updates?”

Problem: the process is invisible

A colleague says:

“The system validates, normalizes and reconciles the request before committing state.”

You might know all four verbs and still not know what happens to one actual request. Ask for a walk-through:

“Could you take one request and walk me through what happens from start to finish?”

Problem: the boundary is fuzzy

Someone says:

“That counts as professional communication.”

You may understand the general idea but not know which similar behaviours fall outside it. Ask for a contrast:

“Could you give me one example that would count and one similar example that wouldn’t?”

More words are useful only when more words are the thing you need. Sometimes your brain has received a beautifully formatted cloud and would prefer one person, one action and one result.

Ask for a SIMPLE CASE when complexity is the blocker

A simple example reduces moving parts. It does not need to be childish or unrealistic; it only needs to let you see the core relationship before extra conditions arrive.

Useful requests:

• “Could you give me the simplest example first?”
• “Could we start with a basic case?”
• “What’s a simple example with just one person or one decision?”

Use this when the explanation contains several variables, exceptions or technical terms at once. After the simple case makes sense, you can add the complexity back.

Ask for a REAL SITUATION when you know the definition but cannot use it

A definition may tell you what a concept means without telling you what anyone actually does.

Suppose you receive the feedback:

“You should be more proactive.”

“Can you define proactive?” may not solve your practical problem. Better:

• “Could you give me an example of a recent situation where you expected me to act differently?”
• “What would being more proactive look like in this role?”
• “Could you give me one concrete action you would have expected?”

Carnegie Mellon University’s Eberly Center guidance on course content and examples recommends multiple concrete examples or references when possible for learners who are unfamiliar with a concept and notes that follow-up feedback can reveal when examples did not connect. That does not mean one example proves a concept. It means a different or more concrete representation can sometimes make the intended meaning easier to examine.

Ask for a WALK-THROUGH when the nouns make sense but the process does not

Process explanations often arrive as tidy nouns: validation, approval, escalation, reconciliation, review. The listener’s problem is temporal: what happens first?

Try:

• “Could you walk me through one example step by step?”
• “Could we take one real case from the beginning to the end?”
• “What happens first in that process?”
• “And after that, what happens next?”

Notice the difference between asking for more detail and asking for sequence. “Could you elaborate?” may produce a richer theory. “Could you walk me through one case?” asks the speaker to make the order visible.

Ask for FIT / DOESN’T FIT when you cannot see the category boundary

Some explanations tell you what clearly belongs in a category but not where it stops.

If someone explains “urgent request,” “material change,” “professional tone” or “high-risk case,” ask for a near neighbour outside the category:

• “Could you give me one case that definitely counts and one similar case that doesn’t?”
• “What’s an example where this rule would not apply?”
• “Could you show me the difference between a borderline case and a clear case?”

This is often safer than asking for a technical counterexample. In logic and argument, a counterexample can do a stronger job: it can challenge a general claim. If you merely want to see a category boundary, “an example that doesn’t fit” or “a case where this would not apply” says exactly what you need without accidentally turning the clarification into a debate.

How to interrupt for an example without giving a five-sentence apology

If the speaker is moving on, a short entry is usually easier for both people than waiting until ten more abstract points have stacked on top of the first one.

These are options, not a universal politeness ladder. Relationship, power, local workplace norms and speaking style all matter. A direct “Can you give me an example?” may sound perfectly natural among colleagues and overly direct in another context.

If you need to interrupt, you can make the reason visible:

“Sorry to interrupt—could I ask for one concrete example before we move on?”

Then stop. You do not need to submit a legal defence of your confusion.

When the first example is still abstract, ask again—but narrower

This is the part learners often skip. The speaker gives an example. Everyone waits. You still do not understand. Your options are not limited to nodding or asking the exact same question again.

Use this FunFluen repair pattern:

ACKNOWLEDGE → NAME THE MISSING PART → NARROW THE REQUEST

It is a practical speaking scaffold, not a scientifically validated protocol.

You can see the situation, but not the steps

“That helps. I can see the situation now, but I’m still not sure what happens first. Could you walk me through the steps?”

You understand the example, but not the boundary

“I understand that case. I’m still not sure where the boundary is. Could you give me a similar case that would not count?”

The example is still made of abstract nouns

Speaker: “Being proactive means anticipating needs before they arise.”

Learner: “Could we make that even more specific—maybe one person, one action and one result?”

An abstract example can sometimes be the original theory wearing a tiny hat. Saying what is still missing gives the speaker a better target for the second attempt.

Do not falsely close the repair

If you are still unsure, avoid “Got it” merely because the other person has already explained twice. You can say:

• “I understand the general idea now. I’m still unsure about one part.”
• “That makes the context clearer. Could I check the next step?”
• “I think I’m following. Could you give me one case where it would not apply?”

You are not demanding infinite explanation. You are identifying the unresolved piece.

A concrete example can clarify a claim without proving it

This distinction matters, especially in academic, professional or persuasive discussions.

One vivid story can show you what someone means. It does not automatically show that the claim is generally true, common or representative.

If the stakes are factual, separate two questions:

• Meaning: “Can you give me a concrete example so I can understand the idea?”
• Evidence: “What evidence supports the broader claim?”

Do not let a memorable example quietly do the job of data, research or proof unless it genuinely supplies that evidence.

Common English mistakes when asking for examples

Useful collocations are compact: give an example, provide an example, illustrate with a case, walk someone through an example, and show how something applies in practice.

Practice: the Example Repair Lab

For every scenario, diagnose the missing shape and say your request aloud before opening the model.

Scenario A: definition overload

Explanation: “Opportunity cost means the value of the next-best alternative you give up when you make a choice.”

You understand some of it, but the definition still feels crowded.

Scenario B: workplace fog

Manager: “Make the weekly update more strategic.”

You understand strategic generally, but you cannot see what should change in your work.

Scenario C: process nouns everywhere

Colleague: “The system validates, normalizes and reconciles the request before committing state.”

You know the terms individually but cannot picture the sequence.

Scenario D: category edge

Lecturer: “This behaviour counts as professional communication.”

You can see one clear case but not the boundary.

Scenario E: the first example fails

You ask, “What does being proactive look like?”

The speaker answers: “It means anticipating needs before they arise.”

You still cannot picture a real action.

Micro-challenge: the Monday-Morning Test

After an abstract explanation, ask yourself:

“Could I picture one person doing something specific with this idea on Monday morning?”

This is a practical diagnostic prompt, not a scientific comprehension test.

If the answer is no, try one of two requests:

• “What would that look like in one real situation?”
• “Could you walk me through one example step by step?”

If you can picture the action but still do not know what counts or does not count, switch to a boundary request instead.

Practise asking before you pretend to understand

Choosing the right request while reading is easier than interrupting aloud when a speaker is already moving on.

You can practise asking for the example type you actually need by choosing a speaking-practice path in FunFluen. Before answering a prompt, imagine one abstract phrase is unclear. Insert a targeted example request, imagine the response, then continue.

The destination provides general English speaking practice. This exact example-request lesson is not preloaded, FunFluen does not verify whether an imagined example is conceptually correct, and it does not guarantee fluency.

You do not need another cloud

If you heard the words but cannot picture the idea, asking for “more explanation” may simply make the cloud larger.

Ask what shape is missing. Do you need the simplest case? A real situation? The steps? The boundary? Then request that representation directly.

And if the first example still does not work, say what is still missing and ask again more narrowly. A polite nod is not a learning strategy. Targeted curiosity is.

Sources

• Council of Europe — CEFR communicative language activities and strategies
• Carnegie Mellon University Eberly Center — Course Content and Examples